Day 04 - Your view on religion
At 16, I converted to Catholicism. It wasn't nearly as easy as I thought. For six months I spent my Wednesday nights at an RCIA class and my Sunday mornings at a teen confirmation class. I've never seen God more clearly than I could the night I was confirmed.
It's been all downhill from there.
Do I think there is a God? At this point, I really don't know. I want to believe there is. I know that I've felt him before, and I catch myself talking to him all the time. But I've tried and tried for the last few years to feel the way I felt when our relationship was good, and I can't get back to that. I don't know how. I'm lost.
Except a distant uncle, no one in my family is Catholic. I spent Easter in Alexandria with some of my Catholic friends and their families, and I was convinced that it was right for me. I like the formality of it. The rich history is extremely important to me. The sacraments make sense. Not using birth control... that's another issue.
I think religion is important, and I think Catholicism is right for me. Religion is fundamentally a relationship, and I'm not great at those. It doesn't mean I wouldn't like to be. I keep thinking that as I grow up, as I eventually become a wife, as I eventually become a mother, it'll come to me. I hope that when I calm down from my weekends out and parties I have time to focus on being a great Catholic.
Hopefully it won't be too late.
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